Every time I read about a young student or an adult deciding to end their life, my heart sinks.
Many of us look at such news and wonder, “What could have been so terrible?”
The truth is, when the mind loses clarity, even a small misunderstanding can feel like the end of the world.
There were two moments in my own life when I questioned whether life was worth living.
Thankfully, I had people around me, and time gave me perspective.
Perhaps sharing these stories might help someone who is silently struggling today.
1. When I Thought My Mother Didn’t Love Me Anymore ❤️
Growing up, summer holidays were magical.
Our cousins would come home, and the house would be full of laughter, games, and endless fun.
But there was one thing that mattered deeply to me.
Sleeping next to my mother.
My sisters usually occupied one side, and whenever I got lucky, I rested my head on her lap. It was my safest place.
Then summer arrived.
My cousins stayed with us.
Naturally, they too wanted to sleep beside her.
Suddenly, I no longer had that special place.
As a boy in the 7th or 8th grade, I didn’t see it as hospitality.
I interpreted it as something much bigger.
“Maybe Amma doesn’t love me anymore.”
“Maybe she loves my cousins more than me.”
That misunderstanding hurt me more than I can describe.
I remember asking myself,
“If I don’t have my mother’s love, why should I even live?”
Today, as a parent, I smile sadly at that little boy.
Nothing had changed.
My mother’s love hadn’t reduced even by one percent.
Only my interpretation had changed.
Looking back, all that was needed was one reassuring conversation.
“This is only for the summer holidays. My love for you never changes.”
Sometimes a few words can prevent years of emotional pain.
2. The Chemistry Practical That Nearly Broke Me 🧪
Years later, during my polytechnic college first year, we had a Chemistry practical mock examination.
I made a mistake in my final calculation.
The solution I identified was wrong.
Before the results were even announced, I was sitting in the college canteen…
…crying.
My friends tried to console me.
But inside my head, I had already written the entire story.
“I’ll fail.”
“I won’t be allowed to write the final exam.”
“My parents will be disappointed.”
“I can’t go home.”
It sounds irrational now.
But when fear takes over, assumptions begin to feel like facts.
For the second time in my life, I wondered whether life with failure was worth living.
Then the results came.
I had scored 70 out of 75.
Only my final calculation was wrong.
Every experimental step was correct.
The five marks I lost felt insignificant compared to the lesson I gained.
Our minds often create disasters long before reality does.
What I Learned
In both situations, I wasn’t facing an impossible problem.
I was facing an incomplete understanding.
A child’s mind fills missing information with fear.
Sometimes all it takes is one mature person to provide clarity.
That person could be:
- A teacher explaining what really happens after an exam.
- A parent clarifying that love doesn’t disappear because of one incident.
- A friend saying, “Let’s speak to our teacher before assuming the worst.”
- A mentor who helps someone see beyond today’s emotions.
I was fortunate in another way too.
My father often told me:
“Son, I don’t need you to score high marks. Passing is enough.”
My mother, on the other hand, always encouraged me to aim for the top.
Looking back, I realize I needed both.
One gave me ambition.
The other gave me emotional safety.
Not everyone is that fortunate.
Some people don’t have anyone who helps them pause, question their assumptions, or see another possibility.
To Every Parent, Teacher and Friend
If someone around you looks unusually quiet…
If they seem disturbed over what appears to be a “small issue”…
Please don’t dismiss it.
For them, it may not be small at all.
One conversation.
One hug.
One reassuring sentence.
One offer to listen.
That may be enough to change the direction of someone’s life.
You may never know it.
But you may have saved one.
Why I Built HabitZup
People often ask why I wrote I’m NOT Busy and why I started HabitZup.
This is one of the reasons.
I believe we don’t merely need more productivity.
We need more presence.
We need emotionally available parents, teachers, friends, colleagues, and leaders.
We need people who can pause, listen, and help someone think clearly before emotions make irreversible decisions.
If my story reaches even one person who is struggling today—or inspires one adult to pause and listen to a child—then sharing these deeply personal memories will have been worthwhile.
Take care of yourself.
And if someone around you is hurting…
Be available.
Sometimes, being present is the greatest gift we can give another human being.
If you or someone you know is thinking about self-harm or suicide, please don’t face it alone. Reach out to a trusted family member, friend, teacher, mentor, or a local mental health crisis service immediately. Help is available, and these feelings can change with support.
